By Sheila
Planting the Seed of the Kingdom of Heaven Dream
I was born into a Catholic family, and from the time I was little, my grandmother taught me how to pray and how to observe Catholic rituals. When I was 15, I started to take on the doctrines of Catholicism such as doing good deeds and loving others, and I was participating in all sorts of rituals in the church. The priest would often say that only by being equipped with these doctrines could we be true believers in God, and then when He came we’d be taken up into the kingdom of heaven. So I would frequently tell myself that I absolutely had to observe the church’s rites and actively participate in church activities so I could become someone loved by God, gain His blessings, and be raptured into the kingdom of heaven.
Can I Get Into the Kingdom of Heaven If I’m Unable to Escape the Bonds of Sin?
When I was in college, I noticed that my church friends always seemed very devout when they attended mass, but in their regular lives frequently did things that were offensive to God, like smoking, drinking, and having wild parties. I felt both shock and irritation at this, thinking, “The Lord Jesus taught us that we have to love our God with our whole hearts, minds, and bodies, and that we should stay away from the enjoyments, tests, and temptations of the world. My church friends appear to believe in God on the surface, but in reality they don’t pay any attention at all to working for Him. They even crave worldly things and seek out secular pleasures—isn’t that violating the Lord’s teachings? I can’t be like them. I have to focus on expending myself and working for God.” For that reason, I felt like I loved God more than my church friends did.
However, I discovered that my own spiritual state could not meet the Lord’s requirements. Even though at church I actively participated in all activities and worked enthusiastically, in my regular life I couldn’t keep God’s commandments. For example, whenever I saw that a church friend who was pursuing enjoyments of the flesh seemed happy and free while I was encountering all sorts of difficulties and adversities, I couldn’t help but blame the Lord. When I made a mistake and was scolded by my family, I would usually make excuses and quibble on my own behalf, and I’d get angry about being rebuked. Sometimes my mom would reproach me, saying, “God taught us to be humble and forgiving but you’re not abiding by His words!” Her words were like a slap in the face; I realized that I wasn’t actually upholding God’s words and I felt a lot of self-reproach, that I was a believer in name only. I couldn’t help but begin to reflect, “Why can’t I triumph over sin? Even though I always confess to the priest after sinning and do lots of good deeds to make up for it, after the fact I just commit the same sin. Having faith this way, can I really obtain the Lord’s blessings?” But then I would think of how the priest has taught us: “If we confess to the priest after sinning, our sins will be forgiven. As long as we expend ourselves and work for God and do a lot of good deeds, we can once again attain the His mercy and blessings. As it says in the Bible, ‘I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith. As to the rest, there is laid up for me a crown of justice…’ (2 Timothy 4:7–8).’” I would then feel somewhat comforted—as long as I went to confession often and continued to work and expend myself for God, I still had hope of getting into the kingdom. So, I continued on busily performing good deeds, working hard and making sacrifices.
A Facebook Post Gives Me Food for Thought
One day in 2017, I opened up Facebook to see what was new that day and was scrolling through just like always when I saw that a sister named Betty had made this post: “Though many people believe in God, few understand what faith in God means, and what they must do to be after God’s heart. … ‘Belief in God’ means believing that there is a God; this is the simplest concept of faith in God. What’s more, believing that there is a God is not the same as truly believing in God; rather, it is a kind of simple faith with strong religious overtones. True faith in God means experiencing the words and work of God based on a belief that God holds sovereignty over all things. So you shall be freed of your corrupt disposition, shall fulfill the desire of God, and shall come to know God. Only through such a journey can you be said to believe in God. Yet people often see belief in God as something very simple and frivolous. The belief of such people is meaningless and shall never gain the approval of God, because they tread the wrong path. Today, there are still those who believe in God in letters, in hollow doctrines. They are unaware that their belief in God has no substance, and that they are unable to gain the approval of God, and they still pray for peace and sufficient grace from God. We should stop and ask ourselves: Could believing in God really be the easiest thing on earth? Does believing in God mean nothing more than receiving much grace from God? Can people who believe in God but do not know Him, and believe in God yet oppose Him, really fulfill the desire of God?” (Preface to The Word Appears in the Flesh). These words were really new and different and immediately took hold of my heart. I’d never heard anything like them before, and particularly the last few sentences were things I had never considered before. I thought, “These words are wonderful! Who said them? They reveal the significance of faith and our goals in believing in God in such a short passage!” I pondered these words, and for the first time quieted my heart and considered my own faith. I thought of how over these years of being a Catholic, even though I frequently participated in all sorts of activities and rituals organized by the church, proactively worked for the church, did good deeds in the community, had suffered a bit and paid a bit of a price, I really had been doing all of that so that I and my family would be blessed and protected by God. Even more, it was so that I could get into the kingdom of heaven in the future. I had always thought that seeking that way was correct and that that kind of faith was acceptable to God and would gain His blessings and approval. But after reading this passage, I started to have a faint sense that the significance of believing in God is very profound, and working hard, giving things up, and expending myself just in return for the blessings of the kingdom of heaven wasn’t truly loving God. How could that kind of faith gain God’s approval? This was like a wake-up call for my heart—I couldn’t help but develop doubts regarding my own dream of the kingdom of heaven. But then I thought back to the 20-odd years I had been a believer. I had persisted in working for the church; could all my hardship and the price I’d paid really all be in vain?
The more I mulled over what Sister Betty had posted, the more I hoped that she would put more words like this up to resolve the misgivings in my heart. I decided to send her a chat request and establish a friendly relationship. She responded very quickly and introduced me to Sister Lily as well, saying we could have online gatherings. I agreed very happily.
Figuring Out the Relationship Between Hard Work and Entering the Kingdom of Heaven
While we were gathering, we first shared our own experiences of faith, and then I shared my feelings from reading what Betty had posted. I said, “That passage is really well put and it’s very practical. I realized that my faith in God was just to gain blessings, not out of true love for God. But I’m still a bit confused, because in the Bible it says, ‘I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith. As to the rest, there is laid up for me a crown of justice …’ and the priest often tells us that as long as we continue on working and expending ourselves for God and do many good deeds, in the future we’ll be blessed by God and get into the kingdom of heaven. All these years I’ve been a believer, I’ve persisted in working hard and giving what I have; could it be that none of that will be commemorated by God?”
Sister Lily said, “It’s really not easy for us to recognize that we believe in God to gain blessings instead out of real love for Him. This is God’s enlightenment and guidance—thanks be to God! We don’t fully understand the truth regarding what kind of person really can get into the kingdom of heaven, which is why these kinds of confusions arise. In fact, many believers think that even though we frequently sin and cannot uphold God’s teachings, as long as we confess to the priest, do a lot of good deeds, and continue to work, give things up, and expend for God we will be accepted by God. Then when He comes, we’ll get into the kingdom of heaven. But is this perspective correct? Is there any basis for this in God’s word? By looking through the Bible we can readily discover that neither Yahweh nor the Lord Jesus said anything like that, nor did the Holy Spirit. Those were Timothy’s words; they are human words, and they just represent a personal opinion. The only portions in the Bible that are the word of God, that are the truth are those spoken by Yahweh, those spoken by Yahweh through prophets, and those from the Lord Jesus. The disciples’ and apostles’ words are not the truth and in spite of the fact that they’re recorded in the Bible, they are just words of man and they only represent their personal experiences and understandings of God’s words, and their own views. Even though they do contain the enlightenment of the Holy Spirit, they can’t be referred to as the words of God. This is why we have to go by the words of God on something so important as entering the kingdom of heaven. If we act according to the words of man we’ll very likely stray from the Lord’s way.
“So then what kind of person can actually get into the kingdom of heaven? The Lord told us very clearly: ‘Not every one that saith to me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven: but he that doth the will of my Father who is in heaven, he shall enter into the kingdom of heaven’ (Matthew 7:21). We can see from God’s words that when God weighs whether people meet the standards for entering the kingdom of heaven, it’s not according to how much they gave up or expended themselves, but it’s according to whether they follow the heavenly Father’s will. That is, those who enter the kingdom of heaven must be people who cast off sin and achieve purification, who adhere to God’s way, and are able to obey, love, and worship Him. If we work hard, give things up, and expend ourselves a lot but don’t adhere to God’s words, instead frequently sinning and opposing God, then we are evildoers and cannot enter the kingdom of heaven. Just like the Jewish Pharisees who opposed the Lord—they were always in the temple serving God and they traveled to the ends of the earth spreading the gospel of Yahweh. In people’s eyes, they worked very hard, gave up a lot, and gave everything they had and should have been most worthy of God’s approval. However, God condemned them as hypocrites and cursed them, saying that they were the ilk of poisonous snakes and sons of hell. The Pharisees had that kind of outcome mainly because, in spite of their hard work, behind it all they were conducting transactions with God in exchange for God bestowing blessings upon them. It was particularly to maintain their own status and their living. The Pharisees were arrogant by nature and lacking any reverence for God. They didn’t exalt or bear witness to God in their sermons, but instead always showed themselves off and used their superficial good behavior to hoodwink believers. They brought believers in front of themselves to have them worship, look up to, and follow them instead of God. When the Lord Jesus was working, the Pharisees became open enemies of the Lord to protect their status and living, madly condemning and blaspheming the Lord Jesus. They did everything in their power to prevent believers from following Him, and ultimately even went into league with the Roman government to nail Him to the cross. This seriously offended God’s disposition and earned them punishment from God. This proves that even if people are able to work hard and give some things up, it doesn’t mean that they are those who follow God’s will. Without being cleansed of their sins, even if they do make sacrifices and expend themselves, they may still do evil and oppose God. If we hold ourselves up to this, we see that even though we seem to work hard on the outside and we are happy to be good Samaritans, helping and supporting our brothers and sisters, our aim is to be blessed and get into the kingdom of heaven. When God blesses us we give thanks and praise to Him, but when we encounter difficulties or disasters, we misunderstand and blame God, or even betray Him. We’re bombastic in our work and sermons, bearing witness to how much we’ve suffered and how much work we’ve done so that other believers approve of us, look up to us, and adore us. It’s not to repay God’s love or allow believers to understand God’s will and requirements, but it’s to seek name and status. When we encounter undesirable people, events, or things in our lives we lose our temper and cannot adhere to the word of God. The list goes on. We can see from this that our hard work, sacrifices, and efforts are not to love or satisfy God, but are just transactional, to exploit and cheat God to satisfy our own ambitions and desires. How could people like us who are constantly living in sin be considered those who follow the heavenly Father’s will? God is holy and He requires us to thoroughly cast off the binds of sin and achieve purification—that’s the only way we’ll be able to see His face. But we are currently filled with filth, so how could we be brought into the heavenly kingdom by God? Only by casting off sinfulness and becoming people who observe God’s will can we gain God’s approval and be worthy of entering the kingdom of heaven.”
While listening to this, I thought, “It’s true. God never said that people who work and suffer a lot will be able to get into the kingdom of heaven. Instead, He said that only those who follow the will of the heavenly Father will get in. It turns out that all these years of sticking to Timothy’s words we’ve been wrong, and it’s entirely contrary to what God requires. When I think of these past years, even though I’ve been toiling away in the church and doing lots of good deeds, it was all to be blessed and get into the kingdom of heaven—it was just to conduct transactions with God, not at all for the sake of loving and satisfying Him. In addition, I still blame God when I encounter adversity and after I do something wrong I still argue and lie on my own behalf. Even after confessing I continue to sin frequently. How could I be considered someone who follows God’s will?” At this point, I said to Sister Lily, “I always used to think that working hard would get me a ticket into the kingdom of heaven, but through today’s fellowship on these Scriptures I’ve realized that this kind of faith is not in line with God’s will. I’ve also come to see that only those who cast off sin and are cleansed, and become people who can uphold God’s will can enter into the kingdom of heaven. But I am still bound by sin and I don’t know how I can escape from this and be cleansed. Can you share more fellowship with me?”
To Be Continued …
